Given the headlines, Coach would, at first blush, seem an odd choice for intractable situations regarding parenting. He is the only parent in the history of the United States to be trusted (and forced) to take children out of their home state after a state court judge banished state-resident children from Illinois. He ventured to the Supreme Court for the same issue. He had sued his in-laws (and some podcasters) into what became quite friendly post-litigation dispositions (pictured above and heard here). It was his ability to manage through a seemingly intractable situation that had the same banishing court grant him sole primary residential custody of his children (without ever having asking it).
 

In short,  when it comes to “intractable disputes,” don’t believe one-sided stories or headlines. It’s always more complicated than that. As noted on PoachCoach, Coach is a unique Litigation Strategist. His former father-in-law* visited Coach in his hometown of St. Louis to tell Coach he had picked the “wrong side.”

THE ONLY SIDE THAT MATTERS IS THE KIDS’ SIDE

Coach’s work putting children first is a passion making him a well-known children’s advocate, whether at ChildrenOfTheCourt, CustodyCartoons, holding schools accountable, or for his own children, Coach is the right person because it is so clear he is willing to help put their own children first.

*His ex-mother-in-law and Coach became even closer. Her love for her grandchildren was the lynchpin of why Coach decided to build TogetherSeparate. He dedicates his work here in her honor. 

Our process includes, acronyms, steps, meetings – the whole kit and kaboodle. But that’s not how and we’re different. It was a quote from the aforementioned Grandma that guides TogetherSeparate in the art of the possible. We paraphrase:

“Sometimes you have to go to war before you can have peace. Look at the Japanese.”

TogetherSeparate believes in reconciliation that leads to productive relationships and focuses on having parents see that too.

That is what is behind our process – both in terms of goals and content. TogetherSeparate’s unique process has proven to quickly determine if parents are invested in conflict or their children. But that’s not determinative. The secret-sauce of TogetherSeparate is to help parents choose to invest in their children rather than conflict.Don’t believe it? Neither did the Rabbis…

 – Parent Introduction: An opportunity for the parents, according to specific rules, to introduce themselves and their children.

– Introductory Parenting Questionnaire (IPQs): A parental questionnaire focused on TogetherSeparate’s unique engagement process. Answers are only Yes, No, or I Don’t Know.

 – Initial Parent Phone Call (IPPCs): These are kept to a minimum, particularly to allow a discussion fo the IPQs and other concerns for clarity.

 – Option Second Parent Phone Call (Optional 2PPC): At TogetherSeparate’s discretion, this can be with one or both parents, together or individually, as a result of the earlier steps.

 – Initial Children’s Meeting (ICM): Both parents are normally present for part of this. TogetherSeparate meets with the children alone, with each parent, and, if the situation calls for it, with both parents.

 – Children-Focused Process: Once TogetherSeparate has had the honor of meeting your children for the goal of helping them, it will be hard to have TogetherSeparate focus on anything else. This is a children-focused process.

 – Report: TogetherSeparate can produce a confidential report, or report to a Court as need be.

 – Ongoing Support: In given situations, TogetherSeparate can help for ongoing support. But, as in many cases, you probably won’t need it.

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